Can One Be Whole even in the Brokenness?

Quick ramble... blog post challenges just don't seem to work for me... I guess I'm better off going at my own speed and writing when the mood strikes. So I guess what I'm saying is this blog will likely never be a daily thing and that's alright ... I'll probably try another challenge at some point but I'll probably also fail at that one too ;)

 

So... brokenness. It's a sad word isn't? There isn't much about it that sounds hopeful or even a little bit happy. It brings to mind, shattered vases, destroyed relationship, heartache, sorrow, lament. It's a picture of 'things gone wrong.' It's a place none of us what to be in and yet... we all end up there eventually.

Brokenness is just a part of my life right now. It has been for many weeks. I often feel that I am coming apart at the seams and that I just can't take one more thing but somehow that one more thing keeps on coming and I am still in one piece. And so it begs the question; can one be whole and broken?

I am finding that the answer is yes, a loud resounding yes.

 

I can worship and still weep

 

I can be sad and still laugh

 

I can ask questions and not have all the answers

 

I can be at a loss for words and still pray

 

I can feel abandoned but know that I am still in the palm of God's hand

 

I can disagree with you but still respect you

 

I actually can live with the things and people that I cannot change and I can really love you
 

 

Coming apart at the seams is an illusion, once I put down my need for control, I feel pretty put back together.

Beauty always exists
 

I am in a season of grief and sorrow both for the living and the dead, and I will move through it at my own pace, as you will. Joy will come again even if peace does not. Even as I look around my life and see shattered relationships, unloving arguments, soul crushing grief and a world gone mad I know I can stand whole because wholeness does not come from the situations I am in but rather from the perspective with which I face them. In these times of brokenness I can allow God to chisel and chip away those things that hold me back from becoming all that He has for me. I will walk these hard paths because they allow me to grow and learn and become more alive. I won't do it without falling once in awhile and throwing the occasional temper tantrum because it's just too hard but I will get up and move forward because if I don't I will stay in the brokenness and that doesn't just seem like a very good option.