Post 12... so NOT going to get through this is 30 days :)
I enjoy blogging, I'm just not very good at it.
And really its not that I'm not good at it, I'm just not very disciplined.
The last few days have been difficult, I've been bogged down with too many cares and concerns and a build up to a super moon super migraine... today is better... sort of.
I'm at a point where I sort of feel like I have schizophrenic faith... what's that verse? 'Oh Lord I believe, help me in my unbelief?' There are areas of my life that I have totally surrendered to God and others where I feel like it's just too much, its a problem I've created so why should I expect God to bail me out? The things I know about God and the ways that I know Him and the problems of my day don't always end up in balance. That push and pull and arguing in myself causes a lot of distress.
But something I realized this weekend was it's not just my journey... I have a partner, the one with whom I am one flesh. We are in this together and maybe some of what we are going through isn't so much about me as it is us. I'm not saying that to put him in a bad light, simply realizing that there are times when we share our spiritual walk because, well, we are one. My devotional readings have highlighted wives submitting to husbands a bit and at first I was like we're good, this doesn't apply but really it does. Bobby and I work as partners, we share pretty much everything but sometimes we start to disconnect a bit and need to regroup. We need to start going the same direction again. We are in one of those those seasons now. I don't like it much but know that we will come out stronger and happier.
Anyway, not where I though this blog would go today and I have lots of other things on my mind so maybe will do this again later today... we'll see how the day goes.
and as a side note, my spell check isn't working so I'm sure this post is riddled with mistakes and errors!
And really its not that I'm not good at it, I'm just not very disciplined.
The last few days have been difficult, I've been bogged down with too many cares and concerns and a build up to a super moon super migraine... today is better... sort of.
I'm at a point where I sort of feel like I have schizophrenic faith... what's that verse? 'Oh Lord I believe, help me in my unbelief?' There are areas of my life that I have totally surrendered to God and others where I feel like it's just too much, its a problem I've created so why should I expect God to bail me out? The things I know about God and the ways that I know Him and the problems of my day don't always end up in balance. That push and pull and arguing in myself causes a lot of distress.
But something I realized this weekend was it's not just my journey... I have a partner, the one with whom I am one flesh. We are in this together and maybe some of what we are going through isn't so much about me as it is us. I'm not saying that to put him in a bad light, simply realizing that there are times when we share our spiritual walk because, well, we are one. My devotional readings have highlighted wives submitting to husbands a bit and at first I was like we're good, this doesn't apply but really it does. Bobby and I work as partners, we share pretty much everything but sometimes we start to disconnect a bit and need to regroup. We need to start going the same direction again. We are in one of those those seasons now. I don't like it much but know that we will come out stronger and happier.
Anyway, not where I though this blog would go today and I have lots of other things on my mind so maybe will do this again later today... we'll see how the day goes.
and as a side note, my spell check isn't working so I'm sure this post is riddled with mistakes and errors!
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